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Dreams

September 11, 2012

Dreams –

When I first read that “dreams are what you wake up from”, I didn’t understand what it meant and felt it was too sober, too pessimistic;

Nobody likes to be too sober perhaps, to stare life in the face.

Then many years later I came across a Japanese poem, in it was a line that was repeated three times:

“For dreams — they will be broken.” x3

I tried to reject it x3, too defeatist, nobody likes to talk about broken dreams, you just don’t put the two words together, I don’t care.

Dreams –

Now, I have to admit and realise that sometimes, yes “dreams are what you wake up from” and sometimes, yes they can be broken.

That’s just a fact of life, be able to face it, nothing sad actually, ok a bit sad.

Well, sometimes they can’t be realised or fall short, simple as that, but that doesn’t mean you’re pessimistic, or lack imagination.

The truth is

Dreams –

they give us something to look forward to, to work for; they brim with potential and give us a sense of great unfulfilled and unrealised potential;

make us feel we’re bigger and better and more important than we just are at a point; that we’re meant for greater things;

that take us away into our own world, a virtual world, do away with the harshness and judgement of this world;

a peaceful, quiet place where you find solace and comfort, less consciousness, friendlier lighting, gravity defying even,

greater elasticity and expansivity of thought, creativity, and imagination, life, more than life itself,

to be put into action, hope, faith, daring, effort, toil, reward.

there to be dreamt of, fought for, still pursuing; on the brink, already fulfilled and realised; there to be broken; there

Like sleep, like emotions, like change of tide, like day and night,

Dreams –

We go in and out of them;

Dreams –

I still believe in you.

“I have a dream.”

It’s still the same dream.


Filed under: General by Elvin
29 Comments »

air of vulnerability

August 28, 2012

life’s fragile;

it could change in a moment.

and so we learn to embrace two things:

one, to embrace now,

two, to embrace change,

not so sure which is harder to do actually,

definitely easier said than done.

when there are many questions and seemingly little answers,

or maybe just temporarily kept from you;

when one foot is put in front of the other;

in times of adversity;

what do we really want or need?

health, safety, inner peace, positive feeling, and your loved ones around you.

gain greater clarity of what’s important and dear to you.

maybe it’s not so easy or not so hard to see.

an air of vulnerability

could break you but holds you together

could weaken you but empowers you

could sweep you off your feet but keeps you grounded

makes you treasure, fight, breathe, live,

try.


Filed under: General by Elvin
25 Comments »

I Feel I Exist

July 17, 2012

I

feel

therefore

I

am

It feels good to just exist in this moment in body, mind and spirit, and then move on to the next, rather than thinking back or looking ahead. Not living in the present and to constantly worry about the future is a torture, an empty shell, when the future hasn’t even come your way and it often has the ability to surprise you. Two good pieces of advice: To keep putting one leg in front of the other and merely to exist in itself, is a valiant effort and commendable in most difficult of times. Like the golf ball analogy, when you’re trying to hit it, you have to focus on the ball, and not think about the swing nor look forward to the end product of the swing, in both cases you probably end up missing the ball altogether. Like the lifebuoy analogy, if there’s only one, perhaps you might first want to save yourself before you can then offer a helping hand and save others, and also just to have some basic trust that your loved ones will find their own ways of survival and take care of themselves in the meantime too. Like in acting, you don’t get stuck on a previous line nor anticipate what your co-actor says next, but to constantly stay and then change in the present. You exist.

I

exist

therefore

I

am


Filed under: General by Elvin
31 Comments »

an empty space, a glowing one

May 17, 2012

it’s nearly 100 days now

his passing has left an empty space

how much has moved on

how much has not

i’m not so sure

you never know what life throws at you

sometimes it’s just haphazard

not always in your control

there are plans and there are surprises

you have to deal with it, make the best of it

at your own time, in your own way

accept it, embrace it if you can

“float like a cannonball”

heavy but feel light

there’s substance but also buoyancy

make yourself float, suspend in the air

come down when you need to

he was full of life, happy, humorous, and well-loved

this is what he’s left behind for us

when all’s gone, perhaps what one leaves behind is a legacy

footsteps to follow

and it’s with his spirit

that helps to ignite this empty space

in the heart

set it aglow

lead us forward

when five fingers on a palm become four

the four find unity and inner strength to become

stronger even

empty spaces here and there

or a huge empty space in fact

but it’s a glowing one

light shines through

and it is with this empty space

that allows us to be filled again

to grow

to move forward

litted


Filed under: General by Elvin
43 Comments »

love & gratitude

April 23, 2012

beyond what can be said in words…

beyond what can be done in action…

beyond boundary… beyond time…

“thank you” is a massive understatement of what my heart hopes to express


Filed under: General by Elvin
46 Comments »

give me a second more

March 25, 2012

if only for a short glimpse

just to say one more word

will you spare me a second more

he woke suddenly in my dream

he was alive, it felt real, it was real

i felt it was real

i got what i wished for

i said that was all i wished for

but i realised

it wasn’t about that second more

but everything that had come before it

still i felt

it was a second too short

give me a second more

will you

please

a second more


Filed under: General by Elvin
63 Comments »

No Response 没有反应的反应

January 15, 2012

Sometimes the best response is no response at all.

有时没有反应的反应是最好的反应。


Filed under: General by Elvin
30 Comments »

真正拥有 to have truly owned

December 22, 2011

“当你拥有的时候,你已经开始的在失去。”

“当你不再害怕失去, 你就真正拥有了。”

爱情是这样, 事业是这样, 名气是这样, 人生也是这样。

“When you own something, you are already beginning to lose it.”

“When you no longer fear losing, that’s when you have truly owned.”

Love’s like that, career’s like that, fame’s like that, life’s like that too.


Filed under: General by Elvin
40 Comments »

Who’s the Better Actor?

October 26, 2011

“This wide and universal theatre

presents more woeful pageants than the scene

Wherein we play in.

All the world’s a stage,

And all the men and women merely players.

They have their exits and their entrances,

And one man in his time plays many parts.”

– Shakespeare, William. As You Like It.

Is it of hypocrisy and lies, masks and facades, necessary editions and pretences, or is it of rawness and realness, or a relative lack of control and edition?

Who’s the better actor? I wonder. The one who puts everything on his face or the one who puts nothing on his face? Now you tell me.


Filed under: General by Elvin
23 Comments »

乌龟赛跑 The Tortoise’s Race

October 13, 2011

乌龟赛跑+兔子赛跑=龟兔赛跑

The Tortoise’s Race + The Hare’s Race = The Tortoise and Hare Race

就这么简单, 你看不到吗?

It’s that simple, can’t you see it?

乌龟赛跑不就是乌龟赛跑吗?

Can’t it be the tortoise’s race?

乌龟赛跑是以乌龟的身份和立场出席赛跑; 龟兔赛跑是以旁观者的身份和立场观看赛跑。

The tortoise’s race is first-person narrative and you participate; the tortoise and hare race is third-person narrative and you’re a spectator.

我又没说错,为什么你硬要听错, 又关语言什么事?

If I meant it this way, why must you listen to it your way, and what has language got to do with it?

为什么要给自己设定小框框? =)

Why do you lock yourself inside the box? =)


Filed under: General by Elvin
13 Comments »

It’s about Heartbeat, I Think.

October 6, 2011

I’m really glad to have caught up with a group of friends today. It made me realise actually we all have our own sets of problems, be it with relationships or at work, big or small, and that, we are all not alone. Whatever individual bad experience you have had is not anything extraordinarily bad and which sets you apart from everyone else but to put it in perspective and in place, a bad human emotion, phase or experience which you share with many others before you and surely too, many to come, and if any consolation at all, that many before have traversed down the exact same path and felt the exact same emotion that you now feel, so there’s sort of a collective empathy so to speak if that’s any help at all. You’re not the only flickering or dimming star out there in the vast, dark night sky; there are thousands and millions like yourself, each feeling alone and preoccupied with the circumstance in front of them and that’s all they can see; just keep the light, however dim or flickering, because circumstance will change and things will take a turn every once in a while. I have been feeling like a block of wood for some time, as if washed out ashore, devoid of emotion or scared of it, lacking any inspiration, hence I haven’t been writing, because there seems to be absolutely nothing inside, as much as I have stared at the screen many times and tried to force or churn something out, to find an outlet. It’s been a rollercoaster of a ride, a huge paradox, a big enigma, it could be a neverending argument, a complicated dilemma, a seemingly irreconcileable conflict…

At the end of the day, what’s all these about? “Much Ado about Nothing”? “Love’s Labour’s Lost”? What do we make of it all? What sense? Life really should be easier and happier, isn’t it? Well, at least we should all agree that we deserve that little bit more, of happiness, no? Is life really about the process and not the destination? But of course right? Cos there’s no destination to speak of, non-religiously speaking? Life’s really about heartbeat, I think, whatever the process is, whether it’s smooth or filled with bumps and pitfalls, whether it’s improving or spiralling out of control, or even it seems to have come to a standstill, like a body of dead water. It doesn’t matter each time it’s happiness or misery or anger or disappointment or fear or pain or torture or gain or loss or nonchalance or calmness or confusion or mayhem or everything or nothing at all, there’s a heartbeat, however faint, fast or slow or to what rhythm or song, it keeps beating, like a live clockwork, keeps you alive. Never lose that heartbeat, constantly listen to it, feel it, what keeps it beating. When everyday’s a choice… Yes, easier said than done, we all know that, I know that too… But you can do it, I’m sure, you know it too. We all can.


Filed under: General by Elvin
14 Comments »

Countdown: Day 5

September 7, 2011

“A countdown can fly past, or it could feel like a lifetime.”

Nonetheless, the countdown has begun.

It’s in sight, finally.

It’s day 5.

.


Filed under: General by Elvin
18 Comments »

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