Silence
October 6, 2010For a while now. Silence.
All quiet on the brazen front. Not sure if the teeming emotions underneath the self-imposed exile managed to be translated into a form of gracious, composed solitude, rejuvenation. Amidst all the hustle and bustle of feeling being wronged or maligned or accused.
A fortnight ago, I wrote an open letter in my blog hoping to address some issues as objectively as I could to all whom-it-may-concern. Halfway it was written. I stopped. Reluctantly. Now locked away in the locker, the dark room so to say, never to see daylight. “Whom-may-it-concern?” now I ask myself, pardon the cynical laugh.
I was told: “What you write will always be subjective or viewed as subjective, no matter how objective you try to be. People who stand by you will continue to do so and people who stand against you will always have a reason to do so regardless what you say or do so why say or do anything more?”
“Words are powerful; they can manipulate or coerce; but at the end of the day, words are just words, ultimately limited in power. Yours against mine, anyone can say anything. Let your actions speak for you. Let others speak for you if they wish to.”
Unfortunately, your voice is always going to be subjective and hence less credibly regarded though possibly more well-informed.
It’s just the feeling of being wronged or maligned or accused or some form of injustice I didn’t like which I couldn’t come to terms with. I’ll live with it.
Silence. For a while now.
very well-expressed n tks for sharing your thoughts !
Sometimes, or most of the times, some words or thoughts are stopped from voicing out cos of some strong force that are trying hard to stop us.
When we kept quiet, others assume we are fine or we are accepting the treatment given to us. When we voice out, others will assume we are just making a fuss out of a small matter(that they assumed). Every fingers will be pointing at us…
We can’t pleased everyone, and we do not have the intention of pleasing anyone thou. As long we are clear conscience in whatever we do, that’s enough. We live for ourselves, not others. Everyone is entitled to have a fair treatment. Cos we deserved it.
Being silence is ok. Cos i believes time will tell everything. Just move on and be happy. =)
Silence is golden
You are right. The more we explain the more people will say. No matter wat we say people will still comment. So the best solution is to be silence. Time will prove wat is right or wrong. Time will prove who is right or who is wrong.
We can’t please everyone. Jus let them be. Be yourself and continue to be happy.
Cheers:)
There’s this saying empty vessels make the most noise. So, we should always keep silence at certain times. haha.
No matter what we do we can’t please the whole world.
If people likes you, they’ll like you. If some don’t like you, no matter what you do, they still have 1001 things to point against you.
Life moves on no matter what, continue to stay happy! :)
Detach and try not to cling onto poisonous fleeting emotions and words. I would validate to what u have said that time is the best antidote.
And yes, silence can be so deafening that it is capable of hollering the in-your-face replies.
Regardless to any distractions, the second hand continues to tick and only change remains constant while the tangibles and emotions warped beyond your recognition. The remaining earthy manifestations are simply situational. For what u feel and see might no longer be part of your body or soul for many moons to come.
Steady PPP, dude!
“The highest result of education is tolerance.” -Helen Keller
Now all that’s left is to live and let live…
Hi Elvin,
Occasions always arise when there are internal struggles on whether to voice out your opinion or to remain silent..
There is definitely no right or wrong answer to this but i always believe in being yourself and proving your critics wrong. If you try too hard to be someone which pleases everyone ( if its possible), eventually you will just tire yourself out and life will be meaningless.
Happiness will drift away from you too..
I have experienced occasions where people misunderstand me or speak gossips behind me.. But i guess if that person doesnt matter to you, why bother trying to explain yrself/mould yourself into what they want you to be..
On the other hand, if that person is a close friend/confidante of yours, he should be able to distinguish between what is true or not and trust you..
Having said that, i hope that you will just be yourself and remain cheerful always!
if it meant to be explainable .. it will be.
if nt juz by keeping slience is gd.
it calms everyone down
whatever happen.. life still moves on.
jia u :)
Pour half a cup of water and ask people around you what they see. Some will tell you it is half full and others will tell you it’s half empty. DIfferent people see things differently, depending on what stage of life they are at or how they view life. When we are in a vulnerable position, just take their comments as their own personal view. Constructive views are worth considering but destructive views should be moved to our trash folder. Someone once told me that we should adopt a “dump truck” mentality; just imagine we are a dumpster and collecting all the “rubbish” that people are facing in their life. In that way, we will be able to smile at whatever that comes before us and move on with our life without being hurt ;)
hello elvin ng nice to meet u
Hm, Y do i find replies from 3 of u similar? For a particular reason? Whatever it is, damn rite man! I agree lor.
Personally, im not e type who will remain silent if maligned/accused, unless these are done behind my back or are hearsay. My bullets will starting flying ard if e fellow comes straight to my face. However, no pt wasting energy cos at times, e more u try to clarify, e more ppl will tink tat u’re trying 2 defend urself. But then again, it all depends. Life is sooooooo full of contradictions… haiz…..
Elvin, U are very ‘chim’ eh! So full of ink >.< Whether U chose to remain silent or if you decide to voice out, we will always stand by U. We know who U r, tats enuf hor? lol
Meantime, we shall all stay happy in silence lor.
Elvin, you are talented & with your degree in English Literaure, can’t understand why you choose to remain in mediacorp especially acting in channel 8.
Some in channel 8 (especially a particular host is a twack) are not being very respecful to our Singaporean guy.
Chin up, there is a better world out there.
Being wronged or maligned or accused is not a good feeling.Its hurts…
Those people who stand against you is because they had never experience the pain before of being wrongly maligned,so they think is a small matter but it is not,its a matter of principles.
You are right and you deserve the right treatment
I m one of those who stay by you. I alwaz believe like a coin, there is always 2 side to it
Silence is beauty. is gold.
Don’t bother to explain … we know. they know.
Don’t bother to argue with a ‘xiao ren’. waste of one’s energy.
Serenity calms the heart.
Live and let live. The bad man will get his retributions some day.
I agree!! “People who stand by you will continue to do so and people who stand against you will always have a reason to do so regardless what you say or do”
It’s hard to please everyone in the world you see. you might even end up “annoying” more people rather than “pleasing” more people.
So it’s better to just let nature takes its own course..
In my opinion, one should always think positively!
Think of “the people who stand by you will continue to do so”!
we can simply Ignore the “people who stand against you will always have a reason to do so regardless what you say or do so” because there’s really no point so say or do anything more.
IMO, we don’t own anyone a living. We might as well just live our life.. live is short. just be happy. we live for ourselves not others! :)
But Elvin, no matter what, we’ll always be there for you! ♥
Elvin is the strongest and manliest man on Earth oh yeah!!
(HAHHAHA hope that made you laughed HAHAHAH)
Take care!! :D Smile always! ☺
With lots of love,
Yuting.
Oh right, i forgot to add this.
IGNORANCE IS BLISS! :)
I think sometimes, since speaking up can’t work. might as well ignore. hahahha. ;)
getting upset, angry, depress, feeling hurt, felt wronged/accused/maligned , unwilling to remain silent, feel that ppl jus don know me /the true facts enough to judge me/the matter, why cant u jus stop the gossips n mind ur own biz, why do u see n judge on the surface, im not what u think, can we all jus do our own part n mind our own biz, why must we live according to the so call trends n follow suit, why the society deem highly educated as intelligent, driving a posh car means u got wealth n substance, living in private property means u are of higher status n being rich n powerful means u have the upper hands n can look down on others inferior to u, why the gorgeous can have the say n be the bully???? i think we jus care too much about what others think of us, we mind how we look how we are in other ppl minds n views, we want to have good image n clean reputation, we hate to be wronged , hate injustice etc…..
easier said than done, if only we can do what we like, say what we want, (provided they are morally n legally correct) dont care what others say n think about us , life would be much simpler n happier i think.
actually i dont like to remain silent, i always want the justice voice to be heard but in some circumstances im just forced to silence……..
you need a hug. do me a favor? can? get one to hug u. whatever girl friend, boy friend, friends, fans, parents, aunty that bake cakes, kids that running around, uncle that shouting for no purpose….erm..i guess, or whatever that right beside you, enemy will do, just ask them: 你可以拥抱下我吗? if they don’t want gave them a fist lorrrr…
*kidding anyway, i just wana make u =) ermm..i know that’s wasn’t a joke or whatever piece of laughable materials, if u’re feeling “cold” just arrr….
there is more to life..just continue to do your best to whoever that stand by you, support you..perhaps u can start something like sharing more with your love one like fans..i understand u’re writing a blog here and what i mean is arhhh…more interaction with them, talk to them (i think probably u did this in your fan club webpage, anyway, share more with ya fans, let them know what u’re busy with..)
not asking you to so called run away from problem u face but aren’t we suppose to treasure those who meant to us?
looking fwd to see a more bubbly of you..=D
i will look up for shane dawson’s video in youtube whenever i feel sad or less motivated…
Sometimes less is really more. Jia you!
analytical well, too…salute!
Being wronged or maligned or accused is a feeling that’s hard to toss away.
My tolerance is high for everything except for that, just doesn’t like to be wronged.
But somtimes.. we have to take a step backward for the bigger picture.. if arguements non stop due to me, who keep persisting of proving my innocence.. sometimes I would rather choose to swallow my pride and endure, for everyone’s sake, and peace will come(in the expense of me,being wronged of course).
Silence is the word,..the more we tried to explained at times, people will think that we’re just covering ourselves, those people who think you’re guilty, will still find you guilty regardless how you try to convince them.
The innocent will be innocent, in the heart. As long we didn’t do anything wrong, for the convenience of not stirring unnecessary arguements, sometimes.. silence is gold..
cheer up! (:
J*
Ops, i’m too late to found out your blog . Seriously like you ! haha . I feel that you’re the kind of YANG GUANG NAN HAI but after read your blog feel that you’re mature and have some emo feeling . haha ! JUST CHEER UP OKAY ! SMILE SMILE SMILE HAPPY GO LUCKY ON ! XD
Social law makes u live better , Country law makes u live better with the country environment, COSMIC law is the greatest law …. it serves the world = Dharma.
Everything in this world , just a illussion for the ego.
live n let live.
what doesn’t kill you wll make you stronger!
Jia You, Jia You, JIA YOU!!!!!!!!
;D
I agree with that ; people who like you will continue to do so, people who don’t will jump on any chance to put you down, there may b times whereby u might feel accused or wronged but you think that you might have done better by speaking up for yourself, I can understand the feeling … However, the more you explain yourself, the more the other party will justify that they are right.. A man convince against his own will is still an unconvinced man..
Life is like that, sometimes we encounter 坏人, we are better off by avoiding them, I guess this is flight , but who cares if it makes us happier , chin up Elvin, at least u r handsome and taller than me , :p
Hi Elvin,
Sometime it is hard trying to stay silence. However, Continue and enjoy what you are doing and let no others tells you any difference apart than knowing yourself for who are you.
Be happy, laugh your heart out and smile the blues away.
God Bless You.
I don’t want to speculate about you or him because i don’t know the whole story. Anyway you don’t have to accept what other said and think of you because it is not true. Since it is not true, you don’t have to be so affected by it… right? Anyway you are an actor.. you have to face criticism from different people and learn to laugh it off.. ignorance of unimportance things are blissful.
I STAND BY YOU
Words are cheap. Let them be…
Tats just for now. Alws making yourself feel worst.
Wonder y…..
ELVIN!!! I’m a supporter of yours. i always read your every entry. now i read this blog entry of yours i can’t help but to comment on it now. cheer up ELVIN!!!
i really do hope you will get your own silence and room of space to do your own stuff and won’t be disturbed by others! have a short getaway to free your mind from all these!!! JIAYOU ELVIN!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!! CHEER UP!!! :D
Hey Elvin, never really liked your acting from the first time you emerged on the local scene, thought the way your pronunciation is kinda wierd ( later realised it was due to the braces you wore ), and your acting, stiff.
Thats abt that i knew and thought of you, just another good-looking actor among the fame jostling scene.
All these perceptions of you changed when i saw you the in the canteen at the bread stall. You were behind me in the queue, quielty waiting for your turn. I turned around, saw it was you and my heart skipped a lttle.
With any doubt, your good looks caught my attention foremost, but it was that down-to-earth, humble and harmless look of yours that somehow nudged me to give you some acknowledgement, which i did – i told you :” you very good-looking in person hor, heee”..
i know i sounded and looked goondoo, but really, i ‘m not one who goes ga-ga over every artiste, in fact, i do not relish the idea of heaping pretentious and adoring compliments on stars, cos i believed that would get to their heads and make them more arrogant.
But that day i saw you, you gave me the impression that you have the looks, but arent boastful nor abuse this trait of yours, which is the start of change in my idea of you. ( 有时候，人是可以貌相的）
The reserved and shy thanks you gave me for my compliments eventually prompted me to go to your blog to read up on you – i was totally won over after that.
i dun have the habit, nor do i have the patience to read up on other’s blog, but your blog is one with depth, punctured with tinge of humours here and there. Most of all, it provides food for thought, almost every entry is one tht is worth pondering over, complete with the breath-taking pictures you posted, i feel so blessed to be able to see natures of God. Really, it’s all these little yet easily the most touching vibes you provide on your blogs that makes you different from the other artistes. Perhaps i happened to be those who like mind-invoking reads.
What i wanna say is that we ought to give ourselves to know one another better in personal means like these and not judge a person based on our bias and prejudices. Had i not read up on your blog, i would nv know that there’s such simplicity in you. But at the same time, i admire you for your being steadfast in your beliefs, only that different people have different ways of upholding it. I for one wouldnt have been cool-headed like you to pen it down on words, i would have clashed head-on with the culprit..tsk tsk…
beforei sign off, apologise for the long message, would like to share with you on this “Silence” topic of yours :
” Those that matters wouldnt mind, those that mind doesnt matter”
Hope it brings a scent of consolation to you:)
I agree with Meiling.
To be feeling indignant about something is a feeling that will not be eliminated easily because we are human…its human to err so just ignore the negativity and embrace positivity…thats all in life. Someone ppl like you but there are ppl who dont like you. Just take life with a pinch of salt…enjoy life while it last.
在乎，那些在乎你的人。
不在乎，那些不在乎你的人。 :)
Sometimes when other methods failed , silence can be the best weapon to defend yourself. It may not be painless, but it may turn out to be the best one.
all i know is.. be yourself..
people see people do..
but god knows everything…
your right.. haha.. subjective again huh..
but I think your right. =D
I have such people all around.
In France is very much this way. Everything and anything can be talked about and it subjective even be it is some issue the are wrong or right obviously.
Yes, I agree and learn from here that only action specks. =)
Very well said.
Some people are ignorant because they choose ignorance. Some people will always choose justice and the truth.